OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
