i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Got robbed by an ATM. My weekend officially sucks.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
