If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
