Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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