but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Randomize
