we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
The beer is more important than you right now.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize