worst night to have a conscience
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
