how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
there was a trapeze. enough said
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
