All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I found a digiorno pizza in my washing machine.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
Randomize
