Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
