so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm going to write a letter. It's going to say, Dear Every Girl Ever: Take some goddam initiative and wake me up with a blowjob and I will eat out of your hand. Love, Every Guy Ever
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
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