I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Scratch that. Good bye liver, good bye clothes, good bye dignity. Hello awesome weekend
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Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
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I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
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