It's just like the Real World with babies
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
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I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
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I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
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