im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
"I gave a guy a handjob last night, on a dog bed, inside a fireplace. It's going to be a good year."
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
