i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
19 Confessions From A Dude With A Micropenis
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
I was more than drunk as hell I have rug burn on my elbows from ninja roles on the ground..
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
17 Exes Admit Why They Were Crazy In Their Past Relationship
That's how you know it was a good night if two months later you finally realized your skirt never made it home and you found out where it was.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
That moment half way through a run when you realize you have to take a giant shit. I was racing against my bowels that last mile. Now my sweat is suctioning my ass to this toilet seat. Enjoy that NSA.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I can't tell if my roommate is crying or having sex and the fact that there's anime in the background is only making this more confusing