I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
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