So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize