Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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