You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
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i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
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Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
I FLASHED A GUY AT MCDONALDS FOR A FREE BREAKFAST BURRITO. IT WORKED!
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
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