she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize