And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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