Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
What if there is no right person? Maybe it's just the right cat. Or the right 12 cats.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
