i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
