I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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