You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He sent me a selfie with his cat. He has found a way to my heart. And pants.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
This can only be settled by a dance off.
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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