About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
i feel sorry that you can never enjoy the feeling of shaved balls
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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