Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I swear to god, my hangover cure is a green tea and a 15 minute twerkout. works every time
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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