Texts From Last Night

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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up

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  (203): it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up http://tfl.nu/co6p
  Replies (64) Good night (602) Bad night (3557)
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  (606): View more from Kentucky

  A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week...

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  (606): A 21st bday and NYE should be illegal to have in the same week... http://tfl.nu/yplk
  Replies (51) Good night (5162) Bad night (609)
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  (704): View more from North Carolina

  Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.

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  (704): Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining. http://tfl.nu/owux
  Replies (14) Good night (5362) Bad night (1036)
• Favorite

  (414): View more from Wisconsin

  Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch.

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  (414): Woke up to pictures of me cooking wings with a blow torch. http://tfl.nu/js8y
  Replies (5) Good night (4668) Bad night (722)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.

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  (832): He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless. http://tfl.nu/abxi
  Replies (11) Good night (4628) Bad night (743)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.

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  (910): He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that. http://tfl.nu/5zek
  Replies (21) Good night (1943) Bad night (2232)
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  (217): View more from Illinois

  Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg

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  (217): Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg http://tfl.nu/vp09
  Replies (8) Good night (2361) Bad night (634)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged

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  (814): What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged http://tfl.nu/ocss
  Replies (4) Good night (1561) Bad night (1045)
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  (731): View more from Tennessee

  She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro

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  (731): She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro http://tfl.nu/kq10
  Replies (24) Good night (4191) Bad night (636)
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  (604): View more from British Columbia

  Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.

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  (604): Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over. http://tfl.nu/sa4q
  Replies (11) Good night (1462) Bad night (341)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.

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  (253): For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo. http://tfl.nu/ryca
  Replies (3) Good night (1136) Bad night (328)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent

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  (404): Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent http://tfl.nu/17u7
  Replies (0) Good night (880) Bad night (386)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP

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  (724): umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP http://tfl.nu/bluu
  Replies (4) Good night (375) Bad night (660)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...

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  (207): I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am... http://tfl.nu/bw14
  Replies (4) Good night (587) Bad night (417)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard

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  (203): Oooo yea. You face planted on my bed but only half your body made it so you noodled onto the floor but kept saying prepare to be murdered which is when you started taking your pants off but stopped at your ankles cause it was too hard http://tfl.nu/pmzn
  Replies (0) Good night (724) Bad night (309)

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