We're like a lot better than the average bears
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
Randomize
