If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize
