You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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