I feel like this woman may give her husband a hand job mid way through dinner. just saying.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
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