hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
Randomize
