I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
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It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
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there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
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