i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I told you alcohol was flammable, but you didn't believe me until you tried to extinguish your sparkler by submerging it in vodka and the bottle burst into flames.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
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