I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
