not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stretching naked in the middle of my room singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", apparently this is what I do when I'm high and the wifi goes out
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
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