At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I just took what could be the most awkward shit in my life, which considering my definition of awkward and my experiences shitting, is pretty fucking awkward.
...
I was sitting there doing my business and the guy in the stall next to me banged on the stall and asked me how to spell picnic because he wasn't sure.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
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