Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
Randomize
