i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Well, I woke up with a text message from my cab driver that said "I hope you're alive," so that's a good indicator of how I was acting last night.
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
