Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(907): View more from Alaska

my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up

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(907): my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up http://tfl.nu/bsdq

Replies (4) Good night (3230) Bad night (452)
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.

(781): View more from Massachusetts

I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.

(508): View more from Massachusetts

Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.

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(508): Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen. (781): I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night. (508): Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street. http://tfl.nu/mnwi

Replies (25) Good night (1177) Bad night (2485)
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(732): View more from New Jersey

I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at

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(732): I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at http://tfl.nu/9oei

Replies (20) Good night (4669) Bad night (544)
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(312): View more from Illinois

just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"

(1-312): View more from Illinois

go get him tiger.

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(312): just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun" (1-312): go get him tiger. http://tfl.nu/5kmx

Replies (17) Good night (4902) Bad night (1008)
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(248): View more from Michigan

They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"

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(248): They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick" http://tfl.nu/5fi0

Replies (13) Good night (4726) Bad night (950)
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(713): View more from Texas

I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic

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(713): I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic http://tfl.nu/5us9

Replies (3) Good night (4060) Bad night (981)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home

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(203): Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home http://tfl.nu/rxky

Replies (4) Good night (2057) Bad night (753)
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(318): View more from Louisiana

I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.

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(318): I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious. http://tfl.nu/bpk6

Replies (11) Good night (3098) Bad night (779)
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(573): View more from Missouri

Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?

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(573): Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk? http://tfl.nu/c8sl

Replies (24) Good night (2373) Bad night (623)
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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.

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(717): She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl. http://tfl.nu/9cei

Replies (2) Good night (1342) Bad night (469)
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(614): View more from Ohio

I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.

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(614): I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose. http://tfl.nu/hj91

Replies (23) Good night (809) Bad night (1983)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...

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(215): I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands... http://tfl.nu/sf3a

Replies (4) Good night (1147) Bad night (361)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted

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(919): Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted http://tfl.nu/7mo3

Replies (2) Good night (1545) Bad night (543)
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(573): View more from Missouri

I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me

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(573): I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me http://tfl.nu/p784

Replies (14) Good night (1565) Bad night (349)
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(612): View more from Minnesota

It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.

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(612): It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected. http://tfl.nu/ebyi

Replies (4) Good night (842) Bad night (278)

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