Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
I dapped up a cop while leaving the party
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
