I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
Randomize
