I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
All the doctor said was why
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
I do very much feel like vomiting. and I have no idea where that lighter came from. thank you for coming to my TED Talk.
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