Well, what part of "I've heard she has crabs" didn't you take into consideration?
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
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