so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
birth control should be required to get into college
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Randomize
