If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
I just checked and if you bring a picture of your ex they will shred it and give you a free 'hater shot'. Would it be too much to print off one of their wedding pictures and bring it?
I really love that you're not going the 'why am I not married and having a kid yet?' route, but rather 'thank god I dodged that bullet'
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