How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize
