The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
My Mom bought me a vibrating toothbrush. Maybe this is her way of apologizing for throwing away my other thing that vibrated.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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