Picture the opening band right now: euro, beer guts, one member in oversized hipster lumberjack apparel, the other in childsized american apparel and shorts. Singing in german.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
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