i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
My own mom unfriended me on Facebook.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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